Grief and Loss
1. THOUGHTS: Grief hurts! It is painful and everyone suffers differently, but it is also a healing journey as part of your life. Grief is normal for any caring person. The pain may never go away but it will subside. There are five stages in the grief process. Passing through the stages and moving on to the next stages are part of healing process. 1st Denial or shock. 2nd Anger – people may be angry with God or become preoccupied with memories and withdraw for a time. 3rd Bargaining. A period of asking God for more time. 4th Depression People may blame themselves for not doing all they should.5th Acceptance the final step of the healing process. A key part of the process is ability to learn how to feel and express pain without denial and avoidance. Goal for entire process to get back to normal.
2. QUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF TO HELP PROCESS.
a. How did you feel after the death? How do you feel now? When are your best times? How do you think the deceased would like you to be thinking?
b. What are your favorite memories of this person? Can you focus on the good times?
c. What emotions have you had since the death?
d. Do you know anyone else who has the same emotions?
3. FOUR THOUGHTS ON THE STEPS OF THE HEALING JOURNEY
a. Be Patient. Grief Takes Time. There is no exact formula to how long it takes to heal because everyone is different, but do not forget to move your energy toward healing and resuming the parts of your life that still exist.
b. Feel the pain. Pain is normal. Id doesn’t help to tell someone to get over it.
c. Keep up Friendships and Hobbies. Your life is not over.
d. Allow yourself to heal. Don’t focus on “if onlys” wishing that it hadn’t happened.
4. THE HOLY SCRIPTURE: Jesus of course said it best: If you believe in the scripture and Him, it is easier. Jesus experienced those emotions at the death of His good friend Lazarus. Jesus knows the pain of loss and deep sorrow. He knows the incredible power of death. It is natural to feel sad and mourn the death of a loved one. Jesus can lift you up if you let him. Open your arms to him and ask for his peace. Just as our savior Jesus Christ promised in John 14 14 “Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God; believe also in me. 2 My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? 3 And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. 4 You know the way to the place where I am going.” 5 Thomas said to him, “Lord, we don’t know where you are going, so how can we know the way?” 6 Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. 7 If you really know me, you will know my Father as well. From now on, you do know him and have seen him.”
Now is a time for healing. We must join together and ask for our Lord’s peace. Never forget what was said in 1 Corinthians. Chapter 10, verse 13: “Every test that you have experienced is the kind that normally comes to people. But God keeps his promise, and he will not allow you to be tested beyond your power to remain firm; at the time you are put to the test, he will give you the strength to endure it, and so provide you with a way out.”
5. LET US PRAY: Lord, our Prince of Peace, we wish we understood Your thoughts and Your plans, but in the great master plan, it is often hard to understand the why. We may not understand why they must leave, but we pray for Your peace. Help us to always remember that even though we are missing them, they are truly in a better place and to be happy for them. Dear Lord, We humbly beseech Thy mercy, that Thou would place the soul of your servant, which You have caused to depart from this world, into the region of peace and light; and unite her in the fellowship of Your Saints. All these things we pray in your most Holy Name. AMEN